11 months of Axel

Those chubby fingers.  Those mile long lashes.  That ticklish baby belly.  His barely there hair.  

Eleven Months.  Seriously.  I can't take that it is to this point already.  I'm not ready for 1.  

Giving Thanks to you.

{free 16x20 download here}

Normally in November I do a daily thankful.  I've missed it a little bit this year but I think saying I'm grateful for Axel every day might get a little repetitive.   And while I have so many things to be thankful for, he is always the first thing that pops in to my head.  When I look back over the past few years and think about where my heart was when I started an I'm Thankful month it kind of seems like a lifetime ago, and a different me.  I feel like I am whole these days.  I feel happy and amazed that I feel happy.   Its good.  So this month I'm giving thanks.  To my friends and my family.  To everyone who has been a part of this story.  I couldn't have done it without you.  

: rustic graphics via 

Let the adventure begin...

Baby brother is almost here.  Its getting real.  He has a space of his own waiting.  The space is in my heart and in our arms and in the guest room/baby room.  

I feel flighty and unsure of where to start on my suddenly urgent to do list.  But I know they are just things to do.  So I think about him instead.  I think about how calm he is going to make me.  Which sounds funny to say about a baby and all that comes with one.   But its true.  

I think about us.  The different versions of us.   We have been three for so long.  But we were just the two of us even longer than we have been three.  And already it feels like there has always been four.   The four of us.  I like it.

I think about her.  And my heart hurts.  I know her heart is going to hurt too. She is strong and brave and kind and loving.  She will be ok.   I just hope she knows how much we love her.  And can 't even begin to let her know how much she is a part of us.   Part of our happiness.  Part of our story.  Part of him.

There are so many things to do.  But the quiet moments in my thoughts are what are getting me ready.  

<<<>>>

I'm ready.  Let the adventure begin.  

Happy Christmas!!

Happy  Christmas everyone!  Its been a magical day here.   It is even snowing!  We made a video for our Christmas card this year that I hope you will watch.  I hope your day is a blessed one.  Thank you for being a part of our lives.

A cup of cheer | Printable

Ask and ye shall receive!  I've uploaded the cup of cheer pdf to google docs for you to download!  It is a PDF that you can print on cardstock and use for gift giving this year.  {Personal Use Only}

Have  a cup of cheer tags

I printed mine on white cardstock and then rubbed chalk on them to give a more authentic chalkboard look to them.  I also like to rub some black ink on any cut sides so the white edge doesn't show.  

Uuummmmm.... I feel weird about this and I don't quite know how to ask.  But we are friends right? 

I love being a stay at home mom to Ivy.  I love making things and sharing it with  you guys.  I also really want to adopt a baby.  Which it turns out can be kind of expensive. And it can be hard as a SAHM to come up with ways to help out with extra expenses sometimes ya know? So I thought I would try and use my resources.  If you love a free printable that I share, and want to download it to use, would you maybe donate $1 to our adoption fund?  Its done through paypal so its super easy and only takes a second.   Just click the donate button under the printable, or on my sidebar over there.   Of course you don't have to.  NO PRESSURE!!  You can totally download them for free and I'll be so happy that you loved it enough to use it and spread some holiday cheer! Mmk thanks. End awkwardness. 

  I hope you guys had a great weekend!  Ivy and I got invited to attend the Nutcracker on Saturday.  It was a first for both of us.  I know, how did I get to be 33 and never have gone?  Well we loved it, especially my little ballerina.  We got all dolled up.  Ivy even wanted her hair curled.  Which is a really big deal by the way.  

She added my leopard scarf to her ensemble.  Besides the whole socks and sandals thing, she can be a regular fashionista.  But holy cow isn't she gorgeous.  I love her to the ends of the earth.  Even when she makes me be the nutcracker or the rat king ALL day long.  She has been a dancer/ director/ stage hand/ costume designer almost nonstop since Saturday night.  The creative energy never ends with that girl.  

Happy Monday!

Our Adoption Profile

Three years ago as I watched Ivy open Christmas presents I got tears in my eyes.  I just looked at Darin and said she needs brothers and sisters to share this with.  Over three years I have started and stopped and wished and faltered.  Seasons and years have gone by and it came down to me staring at the computer screen crying because I don't know what to say.   Too many emotions to put in to telling someone PICK US.  Pick us.  Please.  And then Darin says let me have a turn.  And its done.  In ten minutes.  How do boys do that?  

It has taken  us almost three years to finally finish.  Thank you to every single person that has prayed, and pushed and cheered us on to get it done.  Our adoption profile is now online to view.  If you or someone you know is looking to place their baby for adoption, maybe think of us.  We are so grateful to you.  

The Lincoln Savings Plan

At the beginning of the year I started the Lincoln savings plan.  All you have to do is save any five dollar bills that you get.   I got an envelope and wrote Lincoln Savings Plan on it. Any time I got change from something that was a $5 bill I tucked it in to my envelope.  When the envelope got full, I wrote how much was in it, sealed it up and hid it in my underwear drawer.   Then I got out a new envelope and kept going.   I started the plan to save up money to take Ivy to Disneyland for Christmas.  Well, then we had a private adoption opportunity that we were so happy about.  So we decided to go to Disneyland for Ivy's birthday in July instead because we would have a 4 month old baby at Christmas.  It became kind of a last hurrah.  A trip together with just the three of us before our family changed.  

Yeah that adoption part didn't work out but what did work out was we had an awesome time in California, the highlight of our year really.   And bonus, July is our busiest month at Greenies so we just went ahead and payed for the trip instead of using all the five dollar bills I'd been saving.  

Since then I have just kept adding to my stash of cash and yesterday when we FINALLY finished up our profile for LDS family services {the adoption agency we are working with} I pulled out my envelopes from the underwear drawer and guess what!  I have more than enough for our deposit towards adoption.  In 10 months I was able to save over $1000. Now that is a fat stack of Lincolns.  The rest I kept in the envelope to keep going on my saving for the rest of our adoption expenses.  

I kind of got the idea from Ivy's piggy bank actually.   We had been sticking any change and any $1 bills in to that ballerina pig for a couple years.  It got full at the beginning of the year and took it to the bank for safe keeping.  That fat little piggy had almost $400 dollars in her belly!  I figured if saving $1 bills could add up like that then $5 would add up a bit faster.  Guess I was right eh?  

Guess you better get an envelope and start saving!    

Adventure Is Out There

This is my favorite moment in UP.  I love that second where Ellie's hair blows in the wind.  If ever I have known exactly how a cartoon character feels it is that very moment. That touch of peace before you decide what you must do next. 

We made the decision to move forward in growing our family through adoption oh a year and a half ago.  But I keep stalling, taking baby steps.  Mostly because my heart just wasn't ready or in the right place.  But with God touching my heart everywhere I turn these days I know its time to race on ahead.  We've met with our counselor, we've started on our paperwork, we pray hard every day for things to work out for our little family.  And we work hard to make sure things work out for our family and our new adventure that is out there waiting for us.

The hard part about working towards your own goals is that it makes it difficult to help others with their adventures.

 My friend Heather has a huge heart and has her own fabulous adventure that she is on.  After her son Samuel passed away she started the Joyful Life Library, gathering up books to donate to local Children's Hospitals.  I puffy heart love the Joyful Life Library.  I'm a mom of a reader and know that more than anything books would be the biggest comfort to my child heaven forbid we were in the hospital.   

I've struggled the past couple months with wanting to help, but not knowing how with us trying to save up for adoption expenses.  Finally I went to Heather and we came up with... 

Bags for Books and Babies! {I love a good alliteration}

If you haven't seen I've added a few items to my shop.  My shop has become my way to contribute to raising money for our adoption expenses.  Its one of the best ways for me to be a stay at home Mama to Ivy and feel like I'm helping out.  I've listed several styles of shopping bags along with a few other things.  The best part about these bags is that with each one sold, I'll be donating a book to the Joyful Life Library.  Its a triple win.  Babies get books, I get a baby, you get a bag.  :) {thats worth a happy face isn't it?!